Aidan's Journal

Aidan is quite a new member of the group, and so his journal begins with the Erebus croas adventure. He left the game soon after, and so his journal ends after the second part. However, his replacement, Alison Smith, picks up were he left off.

Journal Entries - Erebus Cross part 1(The Lady's Favour), Erebus Cross part 2 (Scoundrel's Folly)

Erebus Cross Part 1 – The Lady’s Favour

-- Apparently, Theus sees fit to send me to Ussura in the company of assorted ... personages is the best term, as it remains honest without straining the bounds of courtesy. It is well; apart from leaving Charouse as quickly as I could manage, I had no firm plans after the rumour of Inquisition movement reached me.

I should feel more blessed than I do. Despite the abrupt departure and the party's obvious haste, they could have refused me passage. Neither were they obliged to accept payment in the form of my medical skills -- particularly after the Vendel woman dismissed me as a veterinarian. However, they did both. Of course, I might have been less inclined to accept passage had I known how many powerful groups they were fleeing from or the proximity of at least one set of pursuers. On the other hand, as I find myself hunted in any case, another hand set against me can hardly make matters that much worse. Perhaps if I can make myself truly believe that statement, I will be able to sleep tonight.

A word on the party itself -- this marriage of convenience may well prove difficult. Milady Idunn is the sort of woman I lately shrink from. She is beautiful, but she judges mercilessly and seems to delight in the crueller forms of mischief. Were she more prone to such acts, I might hate her, or at least fear her. For the moment, though, I merely stand wary. I know her kind all too well, though I have never seen such caprice in a human.

I am unsure as to whether I should be wary of Monsignor Alejandro or concerned for him. There is certainly curiosity, as I have never heard of a man surviving such injuries as he has. I ask no questions, though, it being foolish to inquire too deeply into situations in which fate witches are involved. That aside, journeying through Montaigne with such a decidedly nationalistic Castillian worries me, particularly when the said Castillian is so outspoken.

Milord Axel is apparently an Eisen nobleman, and a Knight of the Rose and Cross. Interesting. The fact that he apparently intends to renounce this interests me more. Would the properties so inherent in the Knights dilute over time if the Knight in question was no longer a member of the group? I wonder what Professor Arciniega would make of this.

Milady Francine concerns me greatly. Ladies of beauty and magic worry me enough, but whey they are so fey... Truth told, I know not why she worries me with any exactness; the worry is simply there. Perhaps it is only that she asks so many questions, or her sorcery. I know little of the Porté, but it is said that they walk strange lands, and I want nothing to do with such things.

Milady Violante is unusual. I wish I understood my fascination with those who are other than they seem. Milady Violante can pass as a lad with ease, and a Castillian with greater ease yet. I would inquire further on the matter of her accent, but I have no desire to offend -- I have already blundered in conversation with the priest, and milady Idunn will likely never allow that matter to rest. In any case, perhaps there will be a more opportune moment to pursue the trace of Vodacce in milady Violante's voice. That would be good; if she showed that sort of trust, I would be free to do the same.

I have already said too much, or would have had the circumstances been more normal. However, they were honest and relatively forthcoming about the dangers they were facing. It seemed only fair to warn them of my own immediate danger. As to the other, I have never understood the situation well enough to know if I will be pursued, or to what end. I would rather not find that out.

So I will go on this mission to Ussura with this ill-matched party. I will enjoy the change of scenery, if not the weather, and be thankful for the opportunity to put my skills to use. Also, with Theus's blessing, avoid milady Idunn's sharp tongue.

-- I feel ridiculous. It has come home to me rather quickly just how superfluous I may be to this group, at least in certain circumstances. It is little comfort to me how much the aftermath of those same circumstances require someone of my talents. I would like to be more of use to these people than as someone to simply patch up the wounds.

At least I was able, after our most recent encounter with the Musketeers, to silence milady Idunn ... on the subject of my medical skills at least. I was fortunate; had the injuries to milord Axel been more severe or more plentiful, I might not done so thorough or successful a job. When taken with the splinting of Monsignor Alejandro's legs after his unfortunate encounter with the peasant village, milady Idunn could at least rest assured that my medical skills are not limited to the lower beasts.

On the subjects of the Monsignor and his injuries, It is good to see that my companions are not single-minded with regard to their duty. As a group, we stopped in a peasant village in order to help contain a fire that threatened to consume the entire village. From milady Violante and milord Axel I might have expected such willing, and Monsignor Alejandro must be accustomed to charity by now, but I suppose it surprised me a little from milady Idunn. I do not see what she thought she had to gain from it, but I am more than happy to be proved in the wrong about her. Milady Francine is a little more difficult to gauge, but I have already given up the idea of fathoming that one. She is very fey, and I will not make judgments regarding such a one on such short acquaintance ... if indeed ever. Whatever their reasons, they were all more than willing to be of aid, and it proved to their benefit. Not only was I given a hat to cover this particularly telling shock of hair, but the villagers offered to detain our pursuers for as long as they were able, with lies and offers of food and whatever else they could devise.

It just seems ridiculous to me. Simple villagers with no sword-skills to speak of can protect the group as a whole better than I can. I bear a blade of some import, but I can barely wield it ... at least on the offence. Defensively, I can barely keep myself alive with it. My medical skills are useful to these people, true, but that all depends on my being alive to use them. I am leery of the idea that my usefulness depends entirely upon their ability to keep me safe. I have no desire to live as a pet. I would be useful to them, one way or another.

I could ask milord Axel for schooling with the blade, or perhaps milady Violante. However, I feel disinclined to do so, on the basis that they have quite enough to do without wasting their time in vain attempts to teach swordplay to someone so physically uncoordinated. In any case, that would feel wrong to me; I am already buying my passage and protection with my medical skills and I am unwilling to tip the balance any further. Also, I would be made even less in their eyes than I am now. I will not have that.

All I have left to offer is my intellect. All I can do now is consider a way to use it to their advantage, and to make myself more useful to them. I cannot think why this should be so important to me. Perhaps a streak of MacIntyre pride does actually run in me after all. I am not so sure that is a comfort.

-- I have decided that I very much dislike Montaigne river-ports. They make my clan lands look civilised.

Not to say that all the taverns and inns of this town are uncivilised. Our initial headquarters was a well-appointed place, but I can only guess that we presented a source of unease for the other customers as well as the innkeeper due to our mismatched appearance when taken as a group. Bearing that in mind, it was suggested that the less noble-looking of us went out into the city to seek river passage for our 'employers'. (I am not best pleased to be treated as a servant to anyone, but I would much prefer not to be manservant to milady Idunn.)

After every other drinking establishment had sent us away empty-handed, we found ourselves in what I can only describe as a flea-pit. Milady Violante was very much ... in demand, I suppose I could say. She very effectively dealt with the first man who accosted her quite well; I can only admire the throat strike she dealt that man on the basis that it is something I could never copy in a million years. I had hoped that her actions would serve as a deterrent, but soon after, another man made improper comments and insulted me into the bargain. I will never know what possessed me, but I had a sudden urge to hit him, and no inclination to resist it, suicidal as it was. Theus must have been with me at that moment, if at no other that day, because somehow I managed to put the uncouth miscreant on the floor. While it effectively stopped any further advances (saving the one on myself, and the less said about that, the better), it also made the other patrons far less inclined to be of any help to us. Note for future reference: violence may be eminently satisfying when performed on the right people, it rarely offers solutions.

It was our good fortune that we were stumbled over a drinking establishment which enjoys the patronage of the Explorers. They had financial difficulties which milady Idunn was able to rectify, and we were able to take passage on a ship into Eisen. That would have been far more fortunate had the Musketeers our companions spotted at our base of operations had been less accurate marksmen. I was able to heal one of the wounds but for the time being, I am even less useful than I was previously. Even if I was not physically wounded, I find myself ridiculously seasick. I do not recall being this sick when I left Avalon. Theus has truly been making me pay for that piece of luck in the flea-pit.

-- Perhaps I am not so useless after all. Not so intelligent as I was led to believe either, but not so useless. Then again, I would gladly take such risks for the opportunity to see such a creature as the one we faced ... and to receive the thanks I received from milady Violante. I have no chance at having any involvement with her in a romantic capacity, being so slight and weak and unassuming, but I feel a need to prove myself to her. Perhaps the privilege of being more in her eyes is worth dying for, and perhaps not. I will risk it all the same.

There was no other option in any case. No one wished to test milady Violante's theory -- that the strange artefacts that sighed or screamed in the dark were somehow attracting the creature -- by throwing the bizarre things overboard. The suggestion of the bait-boat loaded with gunpowder was a good one, but no one was willing to be in the lifeboat to receive the barrel. I simply volunteered to be useful, and so that the task could be accomplished before the creature destroyed the ship. It was milady Idunn who should receive the most credit, however. I merely set the trap; she sprang it by somehow setting light to the fuse with a bullet from her flintlock. The creature was not destroyed, but it had neither the desire nor the inclination to renew its attack on us.

In my earlier entry, I describe feelings of superfluousness. I seem to be less superfluous now, but I find that isn't enough. I have acquired a taste for usefulness, and I will not let that pass by easily. I am not well versed enough in alchemy to make any of my original plans be of any use to the group, but I have been thinking of milady Idunn's flintlocks. It might have been far easier for us when we encountered the water-beast if she had been wielding a more powerful weapon, or a more accurate one. Always assuming that I have earned her trust, I may request another look at her flintlocks. I may be able to find a way to use knowledge of them in order to improve them. I may not be able to wield them, but she has proven her ability with them and it would do well to provide such an excellent markswoman with the best weapons that can be devised. It does not make me like her any more, but dislike should not blind me to her abilities ... as my infatuation with milady Violante should not blind me to the secrets she keeps. On the other hand, I keep secrets of my own, so I cannot judge her harshly for that.

-- I am a fool and a fool and thrice a fool. Of all the people to have told of my time among the Sidhe, there could not have been a worse one. If I could have guessed or chosen who I would have told, the guess would have been milady Francine with her ceaseless questions, and the choice would have been milady Violante. But Theus curse it, it was milady Idunn who asked the questions. Would that I were a better liar. Acting is a hobby of mine, but I am far better in performance when I have had a chance to rehearse, and I have not been in such close company for quite some time. It was only by luck that milady Violante was listening as well, and bade milady Idunn hold her tongue. It cannot last, but I am grateful for the respite while it lasts. If I feel I can do so without causing undue problems within the group, I may call her a liar. It may not be convincing as it could be, after my reaction to the Monsignor's Sidhe gift, but it is something I could try.

The only good thing to come of all this is having discussed the guns with milady Idunn. There is hope that she may hold her tongue about my past while I may be of some use to her. I would guess that the hope of advancement in the working of her flintlocks would be of benefit -- financial and reputation -- for both herself and her family. The only difficulty in that is the lack of equipment. I may have to wait until we reach a new haven of civilisation.

I cannot credit it. Milady Idunn knows. Of all people, milady Idunn knows. Would that I could flee. However, that would mean leaving milady Violante, and I am loath to do that.

-- Theus guard and keep my soul; I have seen evil and it is not always human. I should have known better than to riddle with the woodsman; in fact, I did know better. Pride again; he made me feel a fool for my wariness of him. I would do far better to listen to instinct. The woodsman was no mortal man, but a creature, and he had possession of, for lack of a better word, I would call my soul. He took the thief Gregor, and had taken many others in his time. I recall little -- and I despise that, it being too reminiscent of my time among the Sidhe -- but I do recall that milady Violante would not allow the creature to keep my soul, despite the offer of a trade. She could have given me to the creature in exchange for the priest; she would not. I take no true comfort from that, though, as milady Idunn also refused a bargain. I have milady Violante's friendship, but no more. That will be enough, if only I am allowed to love her.

It is strange; I am not one given to heroics, but in the defence of milady Violante, I can apparently perform miracles of heroics to match milord Axel himself. I have delivered a blow in a tavern that knocked a hardened river-man to the floor, and today I gutted a creature for which I have no name. Both times, it was in her defence. Perhaps that is a way for Theus to recompense me for my inability to heal her of the many wounds she sustained in the course of events.

I do love the woman, is the trouble. She is terribly brave and perfectly capable of acting in her own defence and that of her companions. Her honour is unmatched. I would move mountains for her, had I the means. At the moment, however, all I can do is what I am able to do. And even in that, my hands are occasionally tied by personal limitations. It cuts me to the very bone.

Milady Idunn has had no time to spread the tale of my involvement with the Sidhe, what with the whittler-thing and the servants of Matushka. It is well.

-- My involvement with the group thus far has brought about some changes in me, ones I am not sure sit comfortably with me. Snow is not entirely unfamiliar to me, but I have seldom been involved in a snowball fight per se. All the times I have had the season's first snow pelted at me, and I have never felt able to fight back. It is different now. I threw snow at Monsignor Alejandro unprovoked; the throw may not have been a good one, but it did make contact, and I was involved in the proceedings in some way other than being the target. When milord Axel and milady Violante joined in and pelted the poor priest with snow, it felt odd; surely I was supposed to be on the receiving end of this attack? This will take some personal adjustment.

You must admire the Monsignor's perseverance, however; even after the 'fight' ended, he was not content to let matters rest. Despite cold-induced lack of agility, he made a valiant attempt to take his revenge. I do not exactly regret the extent to which it backfired, but perhaps that will teach the man that snow is not simply some amusement to be trifled with.

With all of the goings on, it is perhaps the grace of Theus (or Matushka, perhaps; in Ussura, I am unsure who I should pray to for deliverance in times of trouble) that we took notice of the ambush. For a time, it seemed as though Matushka stood with us, aiding us against her own people, but when milady Idunn killed one of the four... I wish I understood more about Matushka; her powers and her ways. All I can say is that I am fortunate in that I never killed one of 'Matushka's children', though I did wound one. After that fiasco, there was apparently a bear. This group seems to attract danger. I would ask why I am still with them, given this -- surely fleeing Inquisition interest would be less dangerous alone? But I know why I stay.

Milady Violante was hurt. Again. I could do little, yet again, hindered by the snow and the cold. Blasted weather.

-- I have lived an intensely sheltered life. Perhaps I am privileged to witness things so real and concrete as the atrocities of war, particularly while in company, but seeing what has become of Ussura has been a rude awakening at best. It almost makes me long for the sheltered life I once knew. The Montaigne have paid dearly for their incursion, as have the Ussurans for standing in their way. I say again -- blasted weather.

In the midst of all this strangeness was a hint of familiarity, though not of the sort I would have chosen. The concept of camouflage was discussed again, brought to mind by the white tents of the Montaigne. The discussion came to its familiar conclusion, and I despair of ever making the concept understood. Milady Idunn simply cannot conceive that anyone would want to be inconspicuous.

The other piece of familiarity was the Musketeer captain who has pursued us ardently across two borders now. The man's a terrier, right enough. It was almost amusing to find that he and his twenty men could not stand against us ... but of course, some of the thanks must go to Matushka. I like that not at all; surely the grace of Theus was in some way involved in these particular miracles? I am a scientist, though, and cannot delude myself.

In the end, we were presented to Montegue so that my companions could complete their mission. The message was delivered and Montegue, upon reading it, made the announcement that he would be returning home to Montaigne. Milady Francine seemed much displeased about this; she fears that civil war will ensue in her country should Montegue disobey the Empereur so blatantly and return with an army at his command. I do not understand enough of politics to make comment. If Montegue, who must know the Empereur well enough, is not concerned, I will not concern myself overmuch. There are other worries at present, involving the strange compasses and Porté holes and the Midnight Isles.

And to think I thought I could not go to stranger places than the Sidhe lands.

The Erebus Cross Part 2 – Scoundrel’s Folly

-- There has been long debate on our course. Given the choice, I would go to Atelmos and points surrounding -- word is that there is a man there who would, if properly handled, be an excellent tutor in the practical elements required to make improvements on milady Idunn's firearms. Milady Francine, however, wished to see Pavtlow, as it is unlikely that a Porte sorceress would ever be given permission to travel in Ussura again. In the end, duty seems to have taken precedence over individual desires and consensus went that we should travel to Halberg and find the Explorer Colson. He knew something of the compasses but we declined to make enquiries about his interest in them at the time.

Our course changed again, however, when a letter came from a gentleman Explorer by the name of Pietro Villanova, currently in Frieberg. My companions wished to see him again and also thought that perhaps Pietro might know something more about the compasses. When taken with the fact that milord Axel's family ... residence (the idea of estates or Eisenfausts in relationship to anyone I am allied with is going to take some getting used to) are in Freiberg, our decision was made for us.

Strange, but no one asked me if I wished for us to part ways at this point, even those who knew I had a desire to go elsewhere. It appears that my attempt to hire that ill-chosen carriage has tied me to these people. Not that I can complain; while milady Idunn can be difficult to travel with and Francine is so terribly fey and any other complaint I could make about any of the others, they seem decent people for all of it. And of course, milady Violante, though that is pure foolishness on my part.

Back to Eisen, then. Freiberg apparently has no laws. Thankfully, I look neither affluent enough to rob nor attractive enough to rape.

-- I have spent several days now on a river boat with nothing to read and little to do. I am bored rigid and a little seasick. One would think a man from the Highlands would be accustomed to water by this point in their lives.

I have passed the time away by thinking of ways in which to attract milady Violante's interest. I could station myself at her side and speak of idle things, but that would not be appropriate. In any case, I have no concept of how to woo a woman. My one natural relationship was so long ago, I barely remember how that all began. And I have no notion at all as to how my last liaison began.

She does not seem the type to be won by idle compliments about her looks, either. I find her pleasant to look at, perhaps simply because she is not excessively attractive in the conventional sense and I have learned to distrust beauty. However, I doubt any bard wooed and won a lady by telling her how pleasingly average she looks. Also, I doubt effusive compliments about her skill with a blade would mean much, given my near-total lack of skill and knowledge in that regard. There is absolutely nothing of worth that I can say to her without sounding like a lovestruck idiot.

It is better so, I suppose. Being romantically involved with someone in the current circumstances would most likely end in disaster. Even a failed attempt at winning her heart would make matters difficult. Even so, a man needs one soft dream to keep, and I suppose she is mine.

There must be something more I can do than sit here and lose myself in this sort of thinking. Milady Idunn liberated a pistol or two from fallen warriors in Ussura, and I may set to dismantling one. With a better idea of how they work, I may be able to set about improving them, always assuming we will at some point stay in one place for a time.

-- There is a bookshop here in Freiberg. I only knew of its existence through rumours; it is said to be a place friendly to the College. Whether it shelters us or not, it certainly caters to us. I have purchased, among other things, a volume for those who would study Vodacce. The language, and milady Violante's command of it, fascinates me. I have also purchased a telescope; I would not spend another sleepless night without something to capture my attention. If I waste less oil or fewer candles in studies, so much the better.

Also made the acquaintance of Pietro Villanova, a most interesting individual. Perhaps I felt less intimidated by him than by the others when I first encountered them because he was in the guise of Eisen peasant. Amusingly enough, when I arrived, milady Idunn was gabbling about camouflage; apparently the sight of milord Pietro (is he a lord? It is force of habit to prefix everything with milord or milady, and it is my journal, after all) turned out in something other than Vodacce attire brought the lesson to her in a way I never could. Scholar I may be, but I will never be a teacher. And I likely will never hear the end of camouflage from milady Idunn.

Milord Pietro has offered to aid me in my attempts to learn Vodacce, and has spoken of the Explorer's Society with more frankness than I have heard to date. To become a member of this society, as has been hinted, would be interesting if for no other reason than the sheer selection of scholarly material at their disposal. And of course, the ability to study the Syrneth artefacts that so worry milady Violante in greater depth would be quite a coup for the College. Of course, I have been told that the usual method of scientific approach would be extremely dangerous to attempt with the artefacts, so perhaps I should give that more thought.

We are due to take a meal with milord Axel's family. The pains the others are taking with their appearance seems to be infectious; I find myself quite conscious of my utter lack of suitable attire for an encounter with nobility of any stripe. However, even if someone had clothing that would be an adequate fit, I doubt I would wear them. Whatever milady Idunn thinks of my attire, it suits me -- or at least my purposes in life -- well enough. I will not trade them in simply because they will be frowned upon in noble circles. (Ah, the Highland pride.) In any case, I am content to make a note of today's encounters and to explore the library here while the others make themselves more attractive.

-- Last night was absolutely ridiculous. Dinner with Axel's family, drinking alcohol again... Ridiculous, I tell you. I would have done far better to stay in the Explorer's Society library and have done with it.

Milady Violante looked stunning, in her way. There are merits to a pretty frock, I suppose, and to time and care taken with grooming. Provided, of course, that the grooming and accessories merely serve to accentuate what is rather than as artifice. Everyone else looked impressive as well (not that I expect less from milady Idunn, frankly), so I am not sure whether the strange looks I garnered over the dinner table this evening were more to do with my clothing or the fact that I refused the ubiquitous beer throughout the evening.

Of course, I spent the vast part of the evening translating for milady Francine, who unfortunately speaks not a word of Eisen and must have felt vastly left out. I had some conversation with Pietro and finally screwed up the courage to ask milady Violante whether she would be willing to coach me in the art of swordplay. Mention of my own sword school was made but thankfully I managed to be discreet for once.

Milord Axel had a difficult time of it, and likely would have done without the intervention of milady Idunn and milord Pietro in the matter. They seemed to take great joy in hinting at matters which milord Axel would have preferred kept quiet. The von Wendels took matters in their stride, but it was obvious to anyone that his father in particular would have words with him at the end of the evening. Perhaps not the most auspicious way to spend the dinner hour. And we all heard it later when milord Axel and his father went into private conference; despite being given separate rooms for the night -- I think they may have heard milord Axel yelling at his father back in Charouse.

I acknowledge that I had no business trying to find him to draw him out on the matter; after all, I have not had occasion to deal with my family in a very long time. I suppose my reasoning was that I could understand paternal disappointment, but all the same, I have not of late been known for my social skills. On the other hand, I was at least better suited for the situation than milady Idunn, who apparently came to see milord Axel to gloat (that is, if the expression on her face as she left was any indication). At least my intentions were a little more honourable.

I actually drank with milord Axel; the first alcohol I have taken since my stint in the Sidhe lands, I suppose. I thought that joining him in a round of drinking might make him feel more at his ease and more liable to talk, and besides which, it is high time I stopped blaming inebriation for my involvement with the Sidhe. After all, I am not entirely sure I was that drunk to begin with. Additionally, the past month or so has proven that I can do idiotic things without the benefit of drunkenness.

Alcohol helps, however. In the end, I managed to make my feelings for milady Violante plain in front of milord Axel, milord Pietro and milady Violante herself. I am such a fool. And I am not sure that fleeing the situation makes me more or less of a fool. There is the hope that milady Violante will be too drunk to remember what I said or understand its implications, but I hold out small hope of that; if she missed the statement's meaning, milord Pietro will have made it plain. Drink or no drink, I will have little sleep tonight.

-- We found an odiferous riverboat captain who we hired to take us up to milord Axel's castle; we were told we had an hour before we left. I found a boy willing to run an errand for me for a small remuneration and through him, I sent a message to the Book Emporium; Richard Mutz, the man who runs it, is a member of the Invisible College and passes messages along to other places as well as selling all manner of books and things -- the Emporium is hardly an Invisible College haven, but one takes what one can get. I wished to inform milady Pascaut of the situation regarding Montegue -- after all, she will be affected by whatever the outcome of his return may be. I was, of course, careful.

After that task was done, I caught up with the others and returned to my companions, only to find that milord Pietro was saying his farewells. A pity, that; I should have liked to get to know the gentleman better. I had a semi-private conversation with him to enquire as to milady Violante's memory of last night's incidents. I discovered -- not that I was not at least partially aware of this already -- that milady Violante's tastes run more towards brawn than brains. Milord Pietro advised me to try to woo her with my personality. Feh; what personality would that be, then? Self-effacing, nervous and bookbound? Eventually, I convinced milord Pietro just not to say anything to make it worse. While I do love milady Violante, I am loath to do anything that will mar our friendship, at least until she gives me some clue that she might desire things to be otherwise. Milady Francine approached and took an active interest in the conversation at that point, but thankfully, she was more than readily distracted by other matters -- namely, the reasoning behind my drinking with milord Axel in the first place. I had, of course, informed the party previously of my unwillingness to drink. She seemed quite impressed with the "I shouldn't blame the grog for the follies of my youth, milady" argument. (Theus, I am thankful there was truth to that; I make a poor liar.) We left Pietro behind, and Alejandro suddenly became a lot more talkative. I had been previously unaware of how much I enjoyed his silence on matters.

-- The castle held by milord Axel has a great deal of history for the others -- I have heard tales of peasants being drained of their blood to raise a dragon that the group kept from reanimating completely prior to my involvement with them. However, I was content to just look at the machinery on the chair-lift device in any case.

We encountered the Eisen peasants we sent to milord Axel's fiefdom; they remembered us very fondly when we arrived, and it transpires that they are going to name their first-born children after us. Now, if it were just milord Axel, that would be one thing, but the rest of us are from a very long way away, and our names reflect that fact. So in this little village somewhere in the heart of Eisen, there are going to be children named Idunn and Viola (or Violante, whichever name she's going by at the moment) and Francine and Aidan and Alejandro. (I think that one is the most bizarre; Eisen Alejandros.) On the way, milord Alejandro expressed an interest in learning Eisen. He does know one Eisen phrase, by the way -- it goes, "Quick! There's trouble on the west wall!" Apparently, they had been trying for a diversion at this very castle and Axel had boomed out that particular phrase. Unfortunately for them, they were on the west wall at the time. In any case, we could not have the Father unaware of the language of the land, particularly since I have no concept of how long we will tarry here, so I began teaching him a few phrases. A further benefit of this is having a variation in Eisen phraseology from milord Alejandro who, much like milady Idunn, will not drop something he has learned until you wrest it bodily from him and give him something else to play with. I attempted something of a joke on the Father; initially I informed him that the Eisen for "Have at you, you scurvy dog" meant "Good day to you, sir". I then realised that, not only was this needlessly cruel, but milord Alejandro would actually use "Have at you, you scurvy dog" more than "Good day to you, sir" anyway, and rectified the error. That pleased milord Alejandro immensely, and he then asked how one said, "Oi, you! You spilled my pint!” I told him that he could probably stay with "have at you, you scurvy dog"; just wave the tankard for emphasis. He then suggested hitting the pint-spiller with it. Seeing where milord Alejandro's interests lay, I taught him a few other choice phrases; "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries" and "I'm going to go sit over there and be quiet now", which, even if he has no idea what it means, might at least mollify any Eisen warriors he might inadvertently or deliberately anger.

When we arrived at the castle, we found milord Axel's sister Ruth waxing sorely pissed at her brother. Understandable, I suppose; after all, he had dumped about a thousand peasants on this recently depopulated village and kept gadding about, leaving her to clean up the mess. It didn't really help that milord Alejandro was going around happily babbling insults about people's parents and having at people, the scurvy dogs and that kind of thing. Anyway, she vented her spleen and felt a little better, but it still behoved us to keep on heading for Halberg rather than stay overnight.

Last surprise was the evening was Francine; instead of sending a letter to Eponine via Porte hole the way she normally does, actually walked through. I had no idea that she could use her sorcery to that level. It was astonishing, frankly.

-- We seem to have become old hands at mooching off the Eisen nobility. We prevailed upon milord Axel's sister for horses and left for Heilgrund (without milady Francine, but with milady Violante and milord Axel both carrying blooded items, it is not as if she would have difficulty finding us again). Milady Francine turned up on our second day of travel, tried to Porte to us while we were moving, but seemed to lose her balance in some way I cannot explain and landed splat in a mud puddle. After explaining where she'd been and getting sneered at by milord Alejandro (after all, she had been relaxing in Charouse for two straight days while we'd been actually travelling, and the priest has no love for such sorcery), I suggested she ride double with me and, soon after, we were within sight of Heilgrundstadt. We encountered Heilgrund's guard force, who are renowned for their stealth, and milord Axel, who seems to get unduly defensive every single time he runs into Eisen armed forces, damn near got us in a fight. Thankfully, something milord Alejandro said or didn't say got the Ghosts thinking we were feeble-minded and they let us on our way. Well, perhaps not thankfully, but when all is said and done, does anyone really want a bunch of panzerhand-wielding bruisers irritated with them? While I am fond of milord Axel, sometimes I wish he would prioritise.

When we got to the castle, we encountered a gentleman called Ernst, general dogsbody to Heilgrund. Very stoic individual, and by this time I had taken the forefront of the enquiries after Reginald Colson. I think this upset milord Axel somewhat, but there was some logic behind it; one Avalon scholar enquiring after another. When Colson was brought before us, he was intensely enthused; when Ernst asked, "So you know them, then?", the Avalon went into paroxysms about the river trip and my so-called 'heroics' in the decoy lifeboat and milady Idunn's fantastic shot to light the fuse on the gunpowder barrel. This did little to impress Ernst, but at least it satisfied him on the point. He seemed displeased with me for some reason; said, "Oh. Another one of those" and when asked what was wrong with Avalon, he said, "Talk too much". Well, perhaps, but this might be because, unlike some men, we have much of value to say.

At any rate, we were told that all the hangers-on at Heilgrundstadt were obliged to go to dinner and were asked to introduce themselves to Heilgrund himself beforehand to avoid that "who are these people eating at my table?" dilemma. When Heilgrund found out that we were positively dripping with Syrneth artefacts (the compass, milord Alejandro's bracelet and a few other encounters by members of the party), he gave Colson an odd look as if to enquire as to why the Explorer had not mentioned this before. He carried on regardless; apparently, we are to be funded on our trip to the Midnight Archipelago to look for the other compass. This is a good thing; we had expected to have to fund it ourselves, so we should be thankful for small mercies.

Each and every one of us found ourselves in familiar company at dinner. There were a few Montaignes (two teen girls 'on tour' and a gentleman who had something to do with river rights), a couple of Vodacce (one of them a leering fat man), a Castillian lady, a Vendel lady somewhat reminiscent of milady Idunn, an Eisen mercenary woman, an Avalon gentleman and even a Highlander in MacAllistar tartan. Despite the commentary from milord Axel and milord Alejandro regarding the state of my knees and what Highlanders wear (or don't) under their kilts, I was glad I had made the effort to show some national pride. Fergus MacAllistar, who introduced himself to me upon seeing me in clan tartan, seemed rather surprised -- indeed, almost dubious -- regarding my clan affiliations. When I informed him that I was not, as he had guessed, a field medic but a scholar, he looked at me as if he knew that I had been considered a sickly child. Not so much sickly, milord Fergus; simply odd. But no matter. The man had news of home, which took up time. Meanwhile, milord Axel and milady Violante were speaking to the Eisen mercenary; they'd fought in the same campaign as her some time back, but unfortunately, the mercenary knew milady Violante in her Roberto guise. Milord Axel alluded to Roberto having had some kind of sex change but that was ridiculous given that milady Violante's (quite lovely, may I add) dress left little to the imagination. Additionally, milady Francine and milord Alejandro nearly started a war while discussing the Montaigne occupation; Francine said that if Castille simply surrendered, there would be no further need for war and that Eisen had the right idea by, to put it bluntly, 'simply rolling over'. Milady Idunn, for her part, joined the other Vendel lady in a spot of Vodacce-baiting around then as well, and it became difficult to break things down into specifics at that point. However, I did note milord Alejandro complimenting milady Violante over the course of the evening. To take my mind off the burning jealousy (not truly seemly for any man), I spent a great deal of my time discussing my past with milady Francine, who I trust with such matters for some reason.

I have considered becoming a member of the Explorer's society, as milord Pietro suggested. Milady Francine had actually suggested, given my interests, that I might prefer to stay behind in Eisen and examine the Syrneth artefacts and assorted devices used by Colson in greater depth. However, as she well knows, there will be all the time in the world for me to learn matters, but chances at true adventuring only come along a few times in a lifetime, and I am loath to leave the party as yet.

-- We spent some time in Heilgrundstadt, letting Colson examine the compass to get as much information as he could from it before we set out for the Midnight Archipelago. Apparently the island we seek for is called L'Il du Bêtes (Island of Beasts, or perhaps Monster Island); the place is used as an exotic hunting ground for the wealthy Montaigne nobility and no 'guests' are allowed without going through some serious channels or being born the right sort of person. So it's going to be a right bugger getting there, to use the vernacular. However, Colson has arranged for us to be transported to the Midnight Archipelago by someone whose idea of amusement is to get up the noses of the Montaigne nobility. This struck us as ideal ... until we discovered that we would be sailing with Bloody Bonny McGee.

A brief overview of Bloody Bonny McGee. There are tales upon tales regarding the Dread Pirate Reis; no one faces him and wins; people jump overboard rather than face him, and his weapon -- a scythe, of all things -- can cut Dracheneisen. However, Bloody Bonny McGee has faced him and escaped with her life. Twice. He wants her dead, and as it happens, she is seeking him to exterminate him. Anyone travelling with Bloody Bonny McGee would be wise to put their affairs in order very quickly. So, to sum up -- we will be sailing to the Midnight Archipelago -- a place of infamy that makes Francine consistently faint and where her Porte magic is probably not going to work -- and specifically to a private island heavily guarded by the Montaigne, and we will be sailing with a woman marked by the Dread Pirate who paints his sails red with the blood of his victims. I have set my affairs in order and am drafting a letter telling milady Violante of my feelings because frankly, my luck cannot hold out against odds this heavily stacked.

We did meet McGee; she typifies my countrymen and seemed pleasant enough. She had a glamour witch with her as first mate, which was novel. We were given time prior to departure and, as we settled on the ship, there was something of a brawl between milord Alejandro and milord Axel regarding a piece of somewhat ancient history (which is not really my story to tell. Essentially, milord Alejandro ran away from a funeral at which he was supposed to officiate; understandable, since he'd killed the deceased and had every right to be nervous). Milady Violante and I stepped in to break it up and, while the lady pommel-struck milord Axel and merely dazes him, I made an attempt to grapple with the priest. I merely wanted to pull him away from the fray but when that failed, I saw no other recourse but to hit him. So, to my mild shame, I have blacked a priest's eye. I am sure that many Objectionists would applaud me for such a thing, but that does little to mitigate my chagrin. After that, each decided to celebrate Prophetmass in our own styles. Miladies Francine and Violante and milord Alejandro went to church, as is proper for a Vaticine, while milady Idunn, milord Axel and myself, as Objectionists, holed up in a reasonably nice tavern and drank mulled wine.

Anyway, we are now on board ship and headed for the Midnight Archipelago, and I am certain that we shall encounter some trouble on our voyage. If Reis doesn't get us, there will likely be sea monsters. If there aren't any of those and we manage to avoid the zombie pirates that my comrades have mentioned, we still have to duck the guard around the 'game preserve'. And after that, there's still the beasts of the Midnight Archipelago to deal with ... and that's not counting whatever shall have to face to get that other compass back.

I think the last adventure was easier on me. I had no time for foreboding.

-- For two weeks, we have done very little -- milord Axel and I both brought alcohol aboard but had to be relatively careful with it lest we earn the ire of the crew. We circumvented that easily enough; milord Axel befriended the beer connoisseur on board and suggested a quiet discussion of the merits of various beers with tasting in the captain's cabin (if the captain had no objection) while I offered a sup of Highland ale over Highland tales to the captain herself. Apart from that, we whiled away the hours with linguistics -- milord Alejandro underwent tutelage with milord Axel and picked up more Eisen than "Have at you, you scurvy dog", while Violante and I taught each other Vodacce and Avalon respectively.

As we spent so much time in each other's company and she seemed quite pleased to have it continue, I decided to make his feelings at least a little known; I left my preparatory note in milady Violante's pack one day. (Hell, what have I got to lose? I will likely not live to see the Midnight Archipelago.) I was not so foolish as to sign it, but milady Violante seems to have recognised the handwriting; she has spent a few days somewhat avoiding me. Not that I have done much better; I can barely face her until she makes answer to me, and I fear that it will be 'no'.

-- News from milord Axel. His lady Eponine stormed out on him at one point; I did not learn why until much later, after I had heard milady Violante yelling at him in an obvious rage. Apparently, she stated that I am gifted in matters of the heart (could this possibly mean that my prayers are answered and she returns my affections? I scarcely dare hope) and milord Axel came to me for advice. Apparently, milady Eponine has made much of the fact that they do little else but ... erm ... engage in the physicalities of love. I will admit to overreacting somewhat; it seems horrible to me that any man with a woman who loves him should care for little but intercourse of that nature. I allowed myself to get far too carried away and made a slip of names, screaming that he did not deserve a woman like milady Violante when I meant Eponine. But I eventually got enough control of myself to suggest that milord Axel try wooing with words; I loaned him a work of Eisen poetry from which to take some inspiration.

I'm sure this would have gone on for some time had it not been for the crash. A few of the sailors went down to the hold with milord Alejandro and I and found a chunk of rock sticking through the hull with water pouring in. As the sailors approached, two of them were dragged under, and the water went red. Sirens; fascinating creatures, really, if studied from books. Fish from the waist down, beautiful topless women from waist to neck, from the head up they're all jaws and teeth. They're apparently tool-using, which is something I had not known; not content to lure ships onto rocks, these ones grabbed a chunk of rock from the sea bed and smashed it into the hull. We would have to fight off the sirens while the carpenters moved the rock and fixed the hole in the hull. Difficult for the others, as it involves underwater fighting. Difficult to me as it involves fighting, but underwater, as demonstrated by my miraculous failure to drown when thrown off that Castillian trading vessel some years ago, makes little difference to me. It did me little good; the first thing that happened was that I missed an attack and got grappled and bitten by the siren; I eventually freed myself and wounded it, but not before it had bitten me yet again. So I staggered back to tend my wounds above decks while milady Violante and milord Alejandro, the accomplished fighters, tried to fend the sirens off with milord Axel serving as a back-up in case any of the other two took an injury. Above decks, I found that the sirens were too far away to address and barely coherent in any case so eventually, I went back down to the hold and saw milady Violante take the second of two wounds. I tried to drag her out of the combat, missed, got in her way and managed to get her wounded again. We argued over her ability to fight while wounded at some length but, given we were blocking Axel's path into the fray, it is no surprise that one of the sirens wounded the Father and shot through into the ship. It went for milord Axel but he simply struck it with his panzerhand. Milady Violante went back into the fray and I turned my attention to the siren that was in the ship; actually wound up getting the death blow on it. The whole thing finished up with milord Axel and milord Alejandro with relatively minor wounds that I could treat well. Milady Violante, however, bore three serious wounds, which I could, to my shame do nothing about. Despite the wounding she'd taken, milady Violante turned directly to yelling at me, essentially for trying to drag a wounded comrade out of the fray to let a fresh body in to fight. However, after I left, she apparently had to reconsider; milord Axel told her she'd gone too far, pointing out that he had been barely wounded and could have quite easily taken her place had she backed out of the fray gracefully. This resulted in milady Violante feeling even worse. I am not sure how she felt when she reached her bunk and found a small tot of the Highland whiskey I had been saving 'for medicinal purposes'.

I have a clue, however. Later, after the crew thanked our party for basically saving their lives, milady Violante found me to apologise. I told her that he would try to respect her judgement more in future ... and promptly made a fool of myself by kissing her hand. She kissed my cheek (my cheek, like a younger brother! I have nearly eighty years on the woman!) and called me sweet. I went away, dejected, but have been determined to be as polite as possible, even after milady Violante decided to make things plain. She wrote a note saying that she thinks I am a wonderful man but that she isn't sure she feels for me the way a woman should for a beau. I'm not sure whether it was the 'quality gentleman with qualities' or the 'not sure' part that wounded me most deeply, but I tore up the note, threw it into the sea and have resolved to be very polite to her from now on. Funny, how I can tear up the note and yet still read the words carved into my heart.

-- There is something very much amiss with milord Axel and milady Eponine. The lady visited again, this time to say that she'd been feeling out of sorts, being sick, that kind of thing. Instead of seeing the forest, he focused on the trees, suggesting that she go see me, who he dubbed "a competent doctor". ("Competent", my backside! I'd like to see how merely 'competent' he found me when I was healing sword slashes on short acquaintance.) He apparently had no concept of how much like a suggestion that the child be aborted that sounded. Milady Eponine got understandably furious and flounced off. Of course, milady Francine heard about the whole thing and went incredibly cold, suggesting that he have words with Eponine now and make up for this. Milord Axel still appears to have no concept of what he did wrong. I despair of explaining.

-- We were recently obliged to stop for fresh water on this little deserted island in the middle of nowhere and sat in on what appeared to be a Vesten coming-of-age ritual involving people being branded with runes. Terrifying, but all the same fascinating and almost cause for grief -- theirs is a feeling of camaraderie and family that I may never experience. After all, those who bore me and grew up with me are long dead and it seems I will never take a wife and have a family of my own. I have no wish for such things if they cannot come to pass with milady Violante.

There was some humour in the situation; we encountered those strange vegetative growths I have read about called coconuts. Watching milord Axel smash a coconut open with a dracheneisen broadsword is probably one of life's more interesting experiences. The sailors tried to convince us that coconuts were mildly poisonous but no one was truly fooled; both milady Violante and I knew they were talking out their backsides and brought some back for Idunn, who couldn't leave the ship for fear of molestation by Vestens. Vendel and Vesten, while sharing the same country, don't really get along; the Vesten are Viking-style barbarians while the Vendel are traders and consider themselves the most civilised race in Théah. She seemed to enjoy them, but said something about parasols and I don't know what all.

After that, I received an education in the Vendel methods of whaling. We watched them take a whale down and then milady Idunn and I noticed something that looked like an island ... but was there one minute and gone the next. When I mentioned it, however, milord Axel was prepared to think me ... well, I shall be charitable and believe that he does not think me mad, merely overstressed. However, I note he changed his tune when Idunn told him that she'd seen it too, and when a nearby sailor's reaction to the occasional island indicated that this sort of thing was not unknown. The sailor said, "Well, I hope it's not a le..." Suddenly, out of the sea came the leviathan. The creature was incredible; the sheer size takes away the breath and it pains me to the core that I shall never be able to accurately render it to paper. Theus bless, I will never even see it in its entirety. It took the first ship, smashed the second to splinters and stripped most of the siding off the third, which listed and threw people overboard. Since the people in trouble were Vendel, milady Idunn suggested they go back for the survivors but the crew of the Black Dawn wouldn't have it. I feel no qualms about dying at this stage, particularly if the cause is noble (frankly, I am amazed I lived this long), asked for a longboat so that I could go out myself. Apparently, six people are needed -- and that is a minimum -- to crew the thing, and the entire party volunteered to go along -- they are a good-hearted group, but apparently need a little persuasion. Guilt apparently works well.

We rowed out, accompanied by a glamour-bird sent by the Black Dawn's first mate, and we managed to get a fair number of the survivors into the longboat. I offered to go in the water, hoping for advanced warning of when the leviathan was on its way, but no one would let me. Frankly, I believe they all thought me suicidal. When the leviathan came for the third ship, we got caught in its wake, the entire boat tipped but luckily only a couple of people drowned, none of them us. Milady Francine, who had left milady Violante's blooded ring on the ship, went back and told Bonny McGee that we'd survived, we'd rescued a few souls and we were over there someplace. Bonny said she knew, the bird had told Celedoine, and Francine was pointing the wrong way. We got back on the Black Dawn and all was ... well, all was. I cannot say that things are well. I am still to heartsick, even now, to be able to say those words in anything but bitterness.

-- SHE KISSED A SIDHE!

*ahem*

We got underway and ran into pirates. Not Reis and his crew, sort of thankfully. Instead, "The Queen's Gambit", and they did not mean Elaine. No, this 'Queen' would have been Maab, and the entire crew were Sidhe. They fired at us but the cannonballs, while splintering the ship, went right through human beings. Evidently, they weren't out to kill anybody. We tried shouting "What do you want?" but received no reply. Eventually, they got close enough to board and some of us swung onto their ship while some of them came aboard The Black Dawn.

Needless to say, interesting things happen when you board a Sidhe vessel and draw a cold iron sword. The Sidhe pirates backed away from me; not in fear but as if to say, "Right, then; the gloves are off..." Meanwhile, the ship, formerly pure white, went black all around me. And in short, the Sidhe captain, Lord Steel, turned around and demanded surrender or we all would die; "You spoiled the game," they said. (Sidhe and their games. Sidhe and their bloody stupid damaging games!) Celedoine who knows of these things, told Bonny McGee to surrender and she did, at which point Steel said he would take a boon. He didn't want my sword (well, couldn't take my sword, really; it would hurt him) but laid a geas on me; said that anything that sword did, in my hands or out of it, would be my responsibility. He asked for something of milady Idunn's but she refused, and eventually...

Milady Viola gave a kiss as the boon. She offered. And apparently, Lord Steel liked the metaphor. Theus, grant me strength. I cannot face her. I cannot even look at her. I know now that there will be nothing I can ever do to woo her now; there is so little one can do in the face of glamour that great. Now I do not even have the hint of a maybe to sustain me. She approached me about it later; said she was sorry if she'd hurt me. In retrospect, I am quite proud of my reply -- "No, my lady. You have hurt only yourself. You have freed me." I felt for her when milord Axel said, "You never keep 'em long, do you?", but could do nothing. It was all talk, all another stage play, and I know what I have to do.

Anyway, after that we made it to L'Il des Bêtes and piled into a longboat to slip through the Montaigne patrol net. They'd apparently noticed us but the Black Dawn drew their fire. We got on land and headed for one of the towers at either end of the island, hoping to find a path to where the compass pointed -- the centre of the island. We had to creep around a bunch of Montaigne nobles and their servants to do it, but we managed in the end, even when I blundered and nearly gave away our position (curse my 'bony knees'...). We got a ways away, discovered the feeding habits of this ant-like creature (it ate a wild boar-ish sort of thing) and then, monkeys. Monkeys landed on our heads for no apparent reason. Winged things, leviathan, sirens, river serpents, ant-things, giant boar ... and now we're attacked by monkeys? Is this what Theus is reduced to to end my sorry life? Surprisingly, I came off the best of all my comrades in that outcome. I dispatched the monkey that landed on my head in short order, then proceeded to kill the one attacking milady Viola. (Why do I bother, Theus? I will get no thanks for it.) Also surprisingly, the only one who didn't kill one of the monkeys was milord Axel; milord Alejandro killed the one that attacked milord Axel, milady Viola killed the one attacking milord Alejandro and milady Idunn and milady Francine dispatched theirs by the simple expedient of a shot to the head at close range. And most surprisingly of all, the ones that were shot kept moving. The ones that were stabbed died a proper death, but the ones with their brains leaking from the holes in their skulls simply kept moving until stabbed.

We reached the clearing we were supposed to find. The only thing that looked 'wrong' with it, as far as anyone could tell, was what we took for a completely circular pond in the centre of it. Within pillars that apparently created some sort of invisible shield, we found this Explorer whose name we never learned. When milady Francine shot at him, the shield deflected her shot. However, when the Explorer shot at her, it was different, and without milord Axel interposing himself, she'd have been in poor shape. The Explorer then Porté'd our compasses to him, and immediately started gloating. Milady Francine tried to get milady Viola's blooded ring over the force field, but made a poor throw. Surprisingly, I managed to hurl the blooded item over the wall (normally, I throw about as well as a girl, or so my brothers always said), and then milady Francine used it to open a Porte hole on the other side of the shield. She stepped through to start shooting with milady Idunn's fully-loaded guns. She hit once, missed the other time, then got beaten into submission by this guy -- Theus, was he stronger than he looked. With milady Francine subdued, he locked the compasses together, twisted them ... and so he apparently had full control of the island and was going to hold all the rich Montaigne nobles, shut in their formerly Syrneth hunting lodge, to ransom. Of course, what he failed to realise was that turning on the force-fields around the towers turned the ones around this pond off, so we could get hold of him at that point. I was far too busy trying to heal milady Francine to get involved at that point, but the others save milady Idunn all crippled themselves just trying to kill the enemy. But they managed, unlocked the compasses...

And then the Father and milady Idunn, the daft bastards, did the very thing milady Idunn's own vision told them would lead to the end of the world! They slotted the compasses into the compass-shaped slots on this box by the 'pond' (actually a sheet of metal, which projected green light and the various images from the daft bastards' minds) and then milord Alejandro got thrown back while milady Idunn found herself frozen in place. She saw visions, then collapsed and everything went back to normal. So getting back to the boat was a difficult affair, what with milord Axel carrying milady Idunn over his shoulder and milady Viola using me as a crutch, and then having to run from the massive monster that we were too busy fleeing to get a proper look at. But we managed, and escaped with our lives. Allow me to repeat this -- Aidan MacIntyre escaped the Midnight Archipelago with his life!

Not his heart or state of mind, though. McGee told us that they couldn't take us on the rest of her journey, but would drop us off at this Castillian settlement on an island a day's ride away. And a Vodacce lady apparently named Fiora was on the gangplank.

This made what I had to do all easier. I slipped a note into milady Viola's pack and left without saying good-bye. The only thing further I could do is keep hold of a blooded item milady Francine left with the longboat while we were at L'Il des Bêtes; perhaps she will think of me long enough to see where that particular one leads. Then again, I barely know where it will lead, but I could not face the good-byes. Not after the way things have been left with milady Viola. Theus grant that we all meet again, perhaps when I am more ... fitting, loveable, I know not. More of what I need to be.